She is too fine. Wes Craven: The Market research says that people love monkeys. Its time I get my black ass out of here. Jay: I am the master of the C.L.I.T. Tricia Jones: [on "Bluntman and Chronic: The Movie"] Well! Tickets? The white man stole it. OOH you little fuck. Your Momma's going to try to score. All right, gang, let's just shoot some tear gas into the diner, and then when the guys come out with the monkey, we'll... F***beans. Chaka: This movie is gonna make House Party look like House Party 2. What. A 10-82 is disappearing a dead hooker from Ben Affleck's trailer. like me. You know, the one about you and him and your "relationship"? Ben Affleck: No, 'cause I wasn't with a hooker today. Sheriff: Are you fucking crazy? Who's watchin these babies? Randal Graves: See? Once we get to Hollywood and find those Miramax fucks who is making the movie, we're gonna make them eat our shit, then shit out our shit, and then eat their shit that's made up of our shit that we made them eat. Shaggy: Let's cut out their kidneys and sell them to the black market and leave them in a seedy motel bathtub full of ice. - Niggaz With Puppets. Slandering others anonymously. Jay: Tickets? Willenholly: And for the record, while we're one the subject, I knew that wasn't a real little boy. F***in', we got shot at, we stole a monkey, and I got punched in the motherf***ing nuts by a guy named Cock-Knocker. Ben Affleck: Are we gonna have a problem... again? Hooper: You should be. Jay: Man, chicks in Hollywood are so stuck-up. Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back is a 2001 comedy film about two marijuana dealers' attempt to stop a movie about themselves from being made. With sidesplitting dialogue and rampant profanity, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back reunites Kevin Smith's dynamic duo in supreme lowbrow style. https://en.wikiquote.org/w/index.php?title=Jay_and_Silent_Bob_Strike_Back&oldid=2880768, Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License. You are the ones who are the ball-lickers! Jay's Mother: YO, F*** YOU YOU F***ING SQUARE! Jay: , none of you little f***s out there. We came to Hollywood, I fell in love. Justice: Maybe it's because girls don't like to be called bitches, Jay. Check this shit out. See, I knocked up this hot woman friend of ours that I f*** on the side so as to not be all the way gay, but my tubby husband here is 100% queer. Customer at Quick Stop: Are you even supposed to be here today? the wrong way. F***, Biggs, did you even READ the script? Jay: Holy hell, is that monkey waving at us? Jason Biggs: You see! Okay, F***y? Hooker #1: You got 50 bucks, we can get NASTY. Show some respect. Justice: They didn't really steal the monkey. commander! When, Lord when? Whillenholly: I don't get out to the movies that much, but "Bluntman and Chronic" was blunt-tastic. In this world gone mad, we won't spank the monkey- the monkey will spank us. It was like watching "Batman & Robin" all over again. One: we're walking, talking, bad girl cliches. Banky: That's what the internet is for. You gotta do the safe picture. It understood us. Jay: Don't change the subject. Does your daddy know you give a nigga his coffee? is an offshoot of the L.A.B.I.A. And this is your finger, far away from the pulse, jammed straight up your ass. Jason Biggs: There's a script for this movie? Maybe it's some kind of supermonkey. Jay: They don't? We're going to Hollywood! It must be a conspiracy like in the X-Files... ROSWELL style. Love, Jay and Silent Bob. Jay: I hope one rips the other one's shirt off and we see some f***in titties floppin around, yeah! Did you ever get to 3rd base with her? Jay's Mother: Alright, don't you f***in' move you little shit machine. I'm just a Federal Wildlife Marshall. Let's remember who talked who into doing this shit in the first place. Leave 'em out here like that and see what happens. Jay: Miramax? I don't really wanna die. Tricia Jones: Why didn't Miramax option his other comic instead. Then I rub my nose with it. Must kill him, doesn't it! That monkey shot me in the ass and paralyzed me! Will you f*** me when you get out? Do you want to get shot? Jay: I can't belive this shit. When said property was optioned by Miramax Films, you were legally obliged to secure our permission to transfer the concept to another medium. Whillenholly: Hey, stop stealing monkeys. As you failed to do that, Banky, you are in breach of the original contract, ergo you find yourself in a very actionable position. Jay: So all we's gotta do is stop this f***in' movie from getting made! Jay's Mother: Uh - the fat one's watchin the little one? Sidney Poitier’s 7 Most Memorable Performances, All Harry Potter Movies Ranked Worst to Best by Tomatometer, Everything You Need to Know About the Snyder Cut of. Gay, straight... it's all the same. Who'd pay to see that? Stealing the little monkey! The internet has given everyone in America a voice, and evidently everyone in America has chosen to use that voice to bitch about movies. Remember that, commander of all C.L.I.T.s! Chaka's Production Assistant: Or House Party 3! Hi, I'm Banky Edwards, the creator of "Bluntman and Chronic." Jay: All these assholes on the internet are calling us names because of this stupid f***ing movie. Please make your quotes accurate. I feel for you boys, I really do, but Miramax - you know, Miramax Films - paid me a shitload of money for Bluntman and Chronic.